On today's episode, I expand on five blog posts I've written in the past week, sharing insights from my own life experience along the way.
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peace and love.
Blog 1: make the effort. always.
As we get older, we see our friends less often.
We get “busy” with our budding careers, Hinge dates, and all of the other things twenty-somethings have going on.
Because of that, we stop making the effort for the people we care about, often deferring to “next time” because next time will be more convenient, we tell ourselves.
But as reality often reminds us, “next time” may never come.
So you must make the effort now.
Even if it’s inconvenient. Even if it’s expensive. Even if it throws off your routines or sleep patterns.
Because when we do make the effort, we never regret it.
To gather with friends, to laugh and love, to make new memories with people we already have so many memories with, is one of the most powerful experiences in the world.
So the next time you’re invited to spend a weekend with your college roommate, your sorority sister, your childhood neighbor, your old co-worker, please say yes.
Book the flight across the country. Take the train to the sketchy station. Wake up at 4 a.m. so you can get there on time.
Do whatever is necessary, even if it comes at a great financial cost to you at a time when money is tight.
The dollars will always come back, but the opportunity to create lasting memories will not.
And if you’re the only one that ever makes the effort, then so what? Who cares?
All that matters is that an effort is made. If it ends up being you every time, then so be it.
Stop making excuses. Stop getting so wrapped up in your own life that you forget about what’s truly important.
Relationships are essential to our happiness. And we must do whatever is necessary to maintain and strengthen them.
Never forget that.
Blog 2: the truth about accomplishing your dreams.
There is no shortcut to accomplishing your dreams. The path to greatness is far more complicated than just simply showing up and doing a good job.
If you really want to announce your presence, show you’re serious, make an impact, then you’ll need to fully dedicate yourself in pursuit of that goal.
With that in mind, you must understand that there will be periods of time where you don’t sleep much. You might not eat that often. You’ll rely on coffee for sustenance. Your dishes will pile up. You might not shower one day. Your mind will feel like a computer with 87 open tabs.
That kind of maniacal pace is unhealthy, unsustainable, and not recommended.
But sometimes it’s necessary.
And it’s on you to decide when it’s appropriate to go all out, and when you should take your foot off the gas.
If you feel the all-out method could get you one step closer to the goal, then you must do it. You have no other option if you’re serious about accomplishing it.
But if you’re presented with an “opportunity” that is unlikely to advance your career by any measurable amount, then you have to think twice.
You might have to say no. You might have to disappoint someone. And you’ll have to accept that you passed up an “opportunity” in favor of your health and sanity.
It sounds “soft.” Weak. Especially for a young person, because who the fuck are we to pass up any miniscule chance of upward mobility?
Strength isn’t saying yes to everything and figuring it out.
It’s having the courage to say no when others will say yes.
Say yes when the grind is necessary.
Say no when the grind is unnecessary.
Maybe it is that simple after all.
Blog 3: share your art with the world. we all need it.
We’re all creative individuals.
Not everyone is Justin Bieber. Or Charli D’Amelio. Or Kendall Jenner. But each and every one of us owns some unique skill, some underlying passion waiting to be discovered. Something that you, and only you, can unleash into the world.
Unfortunately, the majority of us seldom share that passion with the masses. We make excuses. We fear backlash, criticism. We imagine when we step on stage, post a blog or publish a video, that the world will laugh at us. And mock us. And tell us we suck.
It’s true. The Internet is a weird place these days.
But we can’t let that stop us.
Because if you don’t express yourself, then you miss an incredible opportunity to leave your mark on the world.
Creativity comes in many forms, especially today. Maybe it’s in music. Or writing. Or dance. Or TikTok videos. Maybe it’s in latte art, painting, gardening, or an elaborate food spread.
Whatever it is, find it. Hone it. Work on it in the comfort of your own home. And then when you’re ready, share your art with the world.
It needs it. It demands it.
Art has remained an integral part of the human experience since day one. It’s communication. It’s survival. It’s inside all of us, like a caged lion waiting to enter the jungle after years of captivity. And for us to advance as a society, we must look to art to usher in new thoughts, new ideas, and better ways of living.
It’s always been that way. And it always will. The greatest advancements in human history have come from those who were told it couldn’t be done, that it wasn’t their problem to solve.
But still they persevered, and they changed the world in the process.
So what’s stopping you?
Blog 4: whenever you start something new, this is how you handle it.
New beginnings are exciting.
But big changes come with big challenges.
Whether it’s a new job, class, relationship, or car, the playbook for success remains the same:
Go as hard as you can at the beginning. Follow the rules. Do everything by the book. Get there early. Ask a lot of questions. Show how much you care. Complete all of the assignments, even if they’re pointless.
Because first impressions are everything. People will draw conclusions about you based on your performance in the earliest stages.
Even more importantly, it gives you a good idea of how much effort you actually need to put forth in order to succeed. In this feeling-out period, you’ll gauge what’s needed to get a good grade or to receive a compliment from your boss.
Sometimes (unfortunately), you’ll discover that success actually does demand the level of commitment that’s initially asked for.
But the vast majority of the time, that’s not the case.
So once you feel you’ve earned trust and respect, and once you’ve gained confidence in your abilities to perform the task at hand, then begin to peel back.
Lift the foot off the gas. Slow down. Take a breath.
So much of life is about self-preservation, just simply surviving from one day to the next. We can’t go all out in everything we do all of the time. If we did, we’d burn out and lose sight of our motivation.
So we must strategically save energy in one area of our lives so that we can place that finite amount of energy into another endeavor that requires more of ourselves.
Work smarter, not harder.
Blog 5: the importance of first impressions.
In today’s world of short attention spans, people no longer dig for information. They read the headline that says one thing, but skip the article that offers something totally different. The headline then becomes their “proof,” their foundation of a misguided belief system.
We do the same thing with people.
Our brains -- which process information at hyper-speed -- like to categorize things. Upon meeting someone new, within seconds we label that person as good or bad, nice or mean, cute or ugly, cool or not cool. And whatever conclusions we come to in those pivotal split seconds, those are oftentimes the conclusions that we’ll hold on to forever.
So when you begin a new journey or meet a new person, bring your best self to the table. You know who you are, but other people don’t. If you mess up that first impression, it’s very difficult to crawl out of the hole you dug yourself into.
First impressions are everything.