March 29, 2021

you have to be willing to move on at any time + a special guest(!)

On today’s episode, we'll talk about knowing when it’s time to move on from certain situations in our lives. It may be difficult, but if you feel it deep within you, you need to do it.

We'll also hear from Kara Gray, the newest member of our team. She'll manage the show's new social media accounts and will be producing content across all of our platforms.


On today’s episode, we'll talk about knowing when it’s time to move on from certain situations in our lives. It may be difficult, but if you feel it deep within you, you need to do it.

We'll also hear from Kara Gray, the newest member of our team. She'll manage the show's new social media accounts and will be producing content across all of our platforms. Check her out @karagrayyy on Instagram!

Today's essay:

I can still feel the hollowness of the room. Its emptiness scares me.

The memories replayed themselves in my mind. That classic first night with the jungle juice (why did we do that?) That Friday night we sat home jamming to our favorite songs. All the times I walked downstairs to the sweet smells of cookies and truffles.

For the first time in three years, I’d found a place I loved living, and a person I loved living with. Aside from my overbearing work situation, I was happy. The bike trail was just around the corner. Two amazing restaurants were a stone’s throw away. I walked through a quaint New England downtown every day.

It was everything I’d ever wanted, and I loved every second of it.

And I threw it all away.

Oftentimes, we stay in situations longer than we should. Something deep inside me told me I needed a change of scenery -- a fresh start. It hurt like hell, but I knew it was time.

Taking the leap from a bad situation? It’s scary, but not as hard as you think. It requires planning and preparation. Maybe Mom, Dad or friends need to help you. You might be uncomfortable for a little while.

Life’s too short to be miserable. If you’re in a toxic relationship, an uninspiring workplace or a rough living situation, listen to what your body tells you. Too often we turn off that voice inside our heads. We push it away, even though we know it’s right.

Stop lying to yourself. Take your life back.

You deserve it.

 

Today’s quote: “All is for the best in this best of all possible worlds” - Dr. Pangloss, Candide by Voltaire

 

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peace and love.

Transcript

All is for the best in this best of all possible worlds.

 

Welcome into another edition of The Troy Farkas Show. Good morning, everyone. This is you show that it's not about me. It is about all of us. The twenties are a crucial time in our lives. And on this show, we navigate the highs and lows of early adulthood together.

Hope you all had a great weekend. I had a good weekend as well. Thank you for asking. Very excited for today's show at the end of the show, stick around because going to have a special guest, join me later. The newest member. Of the growing Troy Farkas show staff. I'm very excited for you all to meet her first, but first, let me break down that quote that I just shared with you all is for the best in this best of all possible worlds.

So I first came across that quote, when I was in ninth grade, I was reading this book called Candide by Voltaire. Voltaire is a, a famous French enlightenment writer. And so long story short, the book is just about this guy, candied he's the main character and he, and all his buddies are kind of traversing the world.

And all of these crazy things happen to him. On his journey. And now each character in the book kind of represents a different way of thinking. And so, Dr. Pangloss, he is the optimist. And so he constantly reaffirms throughout the book. Each time something weird happens to them. There's at one point like this massive fire, they come across someone.

Who eats all of their crops and everything that they have with them. And he just basically says all is for the best, in this best of all possible worlds, meaning that everything that happens no matter how bad it seems at the surface, it is always for the better in the long run, it will teach you something that will force you to adjust.

And so that kind of relates to today's episode today's essay. That's that's coming up here in a moment because I found myself. At the end of 2020, beginning 2021. And honestly, you know, all throughout 2020, all of these crazy things were happening around the world, in my life personally. And it is so easy for you to sit and say, why me, why is this happening to me?

Like, why can't I catch a break? And I think one of the blessings in disguise of the pandemic and all the changes that happen in my life, no matter, you know, obviously the pandemic has sucked and you don't want to learn lessons in this way, but. The pandemic kind of accelerated a bunch of things in my life, changes that needed to happen, that I don't know otherwise how they would not have happened.

So you kind of need to look at a lot of these things. A lot of these things that have happened, or the last couple of months, as a blessing in disguise. And so had my work situation not change as drastically as it had had my Connecticut living situation, not changes drastically as it had. I'm not sure if I would have come to the realization that.

It's time for me to go that I got to leave that I got to go do things that I want to do that life is short. And so everything that kind of happens, it is now easy for me to say, looking back that I am so glad that those things happened because I am in such an exponentially better place at this present moment in my life than I was just even two months ago.

I mean, I remember beginning of January. Me and my friends, I called up my girl, Kelsey, shout out to Kelsey and we went to  to talk out my life and my life's plans. And we got some Chipotle napkins and wrote out ABC options and, uh, It ended up that option a, the option that we wanted, it ended up happening perfectly to script.

And I'm so happy that it did because I'm now in a place where I'm enjoying what I'm doing for my work. I have a schedule that I am proud of. I, because you know, I can do like my four hour morning routine every day, which I can do, um, back in the old days. So everything. Not that everything happens for a reason.

I'm not, I'm not sure if I necessarily believe that, but I think every bad thing is really not as bad as it may seem. And so I would encourage anyone out there. Who is maybe in a bad place. Like I was a couple of months ago, debating taking a leap, taking a chance on yourself, blowing it all up and starting a new, I did that.

It was very, very scary. It was a very, very hard decision to do because it's not easy to start over. It's not easy to, to get out of your comfort zone, but I'm doing it. And I'm so happy that I did it. And I hope you guys can all take away something from this essay. So here we go.

I'm sitting in a hollow room. It's empty Erie. I don't like it. The memories replay themselves in my mind that classic first night with the jungle juice. Why did we do that? When our friends gathered around the table in the basement all the times, I walked downstairs to the sweet smells of cookies and truffles.

What happened

for the first time? In three years, it found a place. I loved living in a person I loved living with. I was happy. The bike trail was just around the corner to amazing restaurants. We're a Stone's throw away. I walked through a quaint new England downtown every day. It was everything I'd ever wanted. And I loved every second of it

and I threw it all away.

Oftentimes, we stay in situations longer than we should. Something deep inside me told me I needed a change of scenery, a fresh start. It hurt like hell, but I knew it was time, but as I left that Connecticut townhouse for the final time. I thought I'd made a mistake. My heart reverse course telling me I'd be foolish to leave.

Had great friends, a stable job. It was my life glamorous. No, but it's good enough. Certainly better than it. Once was at that moment. I wanted to stay. I still had time. I could figure something out.

Two months later in this moment, I don't regret my decision.

we have to be willing to move on at any time. The freedom of no kids, spouses or mortgages allows us to do whatever we want. That window lasts only for so long. If three children rely on us for food and shelter, we can't always make decisions based on what's best for us. In those situations, we put others first, but for most of us, we're still years away from those decisions.

Right now, we are our biggest priorities. What's our ideal lifestyle. What makes us happiest? Ask yourself those questions and see if your ideal life within reason, of course aligns with your current path.

Taking the leap from a bad situation. It's scary, but not as hard as you think it requires planning and preparation. Maybe mom, dad, or friends need to help you out. You might be uncomfortable for a little while, but trust me if you're a good person, if you treat others with love and respect and empathy. If you return the shopping cart, when no one forces you to things will work out.

They always do.

Life's too short to be miserable. If you're in a toxic relationship and uninspiring workplace or a rough living situation, listen to what your body tells you. Too often we turn off that voice inside our heads. We push it away, even though we know it's right.

stop lying to yourself. Take your life back.

You deserve it.

too often. We just lie to ourselves and tell us that, that we're fine. That we're happy that we're where we're supposed to be, that we're doing what we're supposed to be doing, but. People don't like change. And I'm a person who loves change, changing things. I feel like if you're not changing, you're not growing at all.

And so I feel like we keep a lot of things bottled up inside there's things that there's changes that we want to make in our lives. And we just don't because it's hard because we don't like change because we don't want to pick up and move because we don't want to say goodbye to people. We don't want to say goodbye to workplaces.

It's hard starting a new job. It's hard getting into a new relationship. It's hard finding friends, all of these things are true, but I guarantee you that. Once you make the leap. Once you give up on that job, on that relationship on whatever it is, it's not as hard as you think. If you are a good person, everything will work out for you.

This was as I was considering making all these changes as I was considering making just like this scary, drastic life changes. I kept saying in the back of my mind, Troy. You come from a good place, you are nice to people. You try to make the world a better place with everything that you do, things will work out for you.

You just got to keep grinding away. You've got to make a good plan, and you've got to put your faith in that, that. The world rewards people with good intentions and good value. So I kind of kept that in the back of my mind. And now, now I'm kind of living a dream. I was looking at some journal entries from December and January, and it was just like me bitching about all these things going on in my life and saying, Oh, if these three, four, five things happen, please just like, throw me this bone and I'll be good.

And those three, four, five, six, seven things have all happened and I'm loving life. And, uh, So thank you everyone for, for the support. Now I, uh, have a big piece of news here on the show. So you've heard me talking on the show over the last month or so that I was looking for someone to help out. I think another part of growing up is when you're young, you kind of think you have all the answers.

You think, you know, everything that you don't need help. And especially when you're a man, it is kind of seen as unmanly as weak to admit any sense of vulnerability to admit that. You don't know everything that you're not as smart as you think. And so I am fully aware of the things that I don't know. And so when I don't know things, I ask questions.

I seek out help. I seek out mentors. Uh, and in this case I have found help in the form of the new social media manager of the show, the. The first member of the Troy Farkas show staff, hopefully many more. Hopefully we can take this thing to the top. So I'm so happy to introduce to you the, I don't know what position you are, Kara, but you are, uh, on the Syracuse women's lacrosse team, the 2021 about to be champions, Syracuse lacrosse team.

Kara, you are a stud. I'm so happy that, that you are joining the show. Joining the squad here, looking forward to too many months, maybe years of working together. Kara, thank you. And welcome to the show. What's up. I totally. Hi guys. Um, I'm Kara. I am a junior at Syracuse and I am the social media manager for the choice parka show.

I'm really excited to be here. I'm really excited to start this journey with Troy, with everyone else. Damn right. Let's go. All right. So what are you most looking forward to doing on the show? Honestly, listening to your podcasts. Like I've, they've been super reflective for me. I'm going through a period of my life where I feel like I have to.

Have a job. I feel like I have to have an internship. Everyone around me seems to be doing everything. And I'm just kind of like freaking out. I don't really know. So listening to your podcasts and hearing you talk to everyone has helped me realize that like I'm on a certain path, like it's going to go the way it's going to go.

I don't have to like stress as much about it, hopefully. So I'm excited to like continue hearing your podcasts. And then I'm really excited to like, get to know your followers, get to like express content. I love making graphics though. I'm really excited to put that out. Let's go. So what are you in your long term?

What do you want to do with your life? What do you envision for you? So I want to do public relations and grow like marketing for, um, a sports like company. Like Nike would be my dream company. If I can do that, I would love that. Or Adidas, or I want to do travel kind of marketing, like kind of get to travel, produce content posts out there.

That'd be like my dream job if I could. So. Hopefully working to that. Okay. Well, if you want to get Nike to sponsor the show, that'd be cool. So start off, I'm going to add that to your task list. Uh, thank you. I appreciate that. All right. So what are you going to be doing for this show specifically? Where can, where can the people find out what you're doing?

Where can they connect with you? Where can they connect with the show? I want all the details. So I have developed social media for the toy market show. I have an Instagram, a talk I'm making a Facebook. And we obviously have our website, so you can find all the Instagram take talking to YouTube about the Troy Farkas show and then our website's Detroit Farkas show.com.

And there will be announcing when podcasts are coming out, I'll be doing previews into the charities that people will be like talking about donating to, um, I'll be posting stories, posts like take top funny tick tock, tick tock, like. Episodes sharing the quotes that Troy shares. So I'll be sharing kind of everything about the show on these social medias.

Um, I'll be interacting with our followers, with our listeners, hearing what you guys like about the show, kind of finding out what more you want to hear. And I'll be talking to Troy about all of that. Hell. Yeah. Yeah. So I've loved getting a bunch of DMS. I've been getting a lot of DMS from people I've never met or people away from my past that I haven't talked to in a while.

So we're going to be doing a lot more interaction. I love hearing from you. You know, I don't want anyone's money. I want people's love. I want people's kind words. That's what I'm all about here on this show is spreading. Some love, loves some positivity, trying to get everyone better. So. You can interact with us by sliding into our DMS, by reviewing the show on Apple podcasts.

There's a link to that on the website as well, by leaving comments on YouTube, whatever it is. I know that people love watching podcasts on YouTube. I personally don't, but apparently a lot of people do. And especially like people more your age, Kara. Uh, so we'll be posting clips from. The shows, in some cases we'll be posting full episodes from the shows we'll be posting, you know, about the charities and some of the, the highlights from the show.

So, uh, I'm super excited for that to have this, this visual component to the shows. Yeah. I'm really excited. And if any of the listeners want, they can reach out on my private page, they can reach out to me on either the Instagram. You can slide in my DMS. I'm always open to talk. I love talking to people, so feel free.

All right. And where, where can they find you by the way? Uh, my Instagram is Kara K a R a gray G R a Y with three wise at the end. So if anyone wants to hit me with a follow more, let's go. Yeah. I mean, Kara, I'm not gonna lie. You've got some tick talks out there that are like half a million views, quite impressive.

Oh yeah. I built, um, a beer pong table recording. That was kind of my hobby for this, for the time being. So I actually got to do some interviews on that and then. Unfortunately video of me and my roommates trying to break into our college house went viral because we forgot her key and we didn't want to call my landlord.

So yeah, that ended up on Barstool cues, you know, shout outs. Hey, that I haven't done the same thing myself, but maybe what you just said there is that there's a. Detroit Parker show beer pong table coming in the future. Oh my God. Maybe I'll add that to the table. Let's go. Well, Kara I'm, I'm a superstar.

That'd be working with you. Super excited that you'll be joining the team. You will now be like the brains behind the operation, the beauty behind the operation. I'm just a mere figurehead and all of this, you're going to be killing it. You are going to be. In addition to a national champion and a couple of months going speed, the, uh, the star of the show here.

So Kara, thank you for joining me. Looking forward to working with you again. If you want to comment on the show, head over to the tree frog show.com hit the reviews tab. Super simple. You can follow us on all those channels that Kara mentioned. It's been a running joke on the show. If you've been listening since day one, cause I always say like, Oh, you know, we do this, we do this.

But then I was correct myself and say, it's me, what am I talking about? There's no one else on the show. It is literally just me doing everything. It's my name, it's me, everything. But now it's a weight now it is fully away. And I hope it becomes even more than me and Kara down the line. So I'm looking forward to looking forward to developing that.

But until then, We'll be back on Thursday, exciting interview, coming up with a musician friend of mine. We're going to talk about a lot of exciting things in her life and, uh, all of her great music that she's working on. So having a wonderful week have a great Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, and, uh, has some fun interactions work hard and get after it be healthy, do something fun.

Call up a friend called the grandma, whatever. We'll talk on Thursday.